Tuesday, June 16, 2009

A Collection of Open Letters Round Three

You can view 1 & 2 here.

Dear EVERYONE IN THIS G-D CITY,
Stay to the right. On the street, at the subway station, WHEREVER. Just stay to the right and everyone will get where they need to go. It's NOT THAT HARD. This goes double for you Mr. Speedy McWheelChair. Being handicapped does not give you the right to cruise directly into people on Park Avenue South. I don't think those things are made to go so quickly and you almost ran me down. STAY TO THE RIGHT.

Thank You,
Sarah

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Thanks to _The Moose_ for the picture

Dear Ladies and Girls of Bushwick,
Fuzzy pink slippers are not appropriate outdoor footwear. I don't know who started this trend, but it is absolutely disgusting. I have seen at least five girls this week alone wearing them. What's the deal? This is not a clean neighborhood, God knows what you're picking up with those things. And really? You couldn't be bothered to put on real shoes? You're in PUBLIC. Step it up, ladies.

I'm Serious.

Sarah

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Dear All Of You Who Have Been Giving Me Shit About This For Years,

I finally saw The Big Lebowski all the way through! After years of people trying to show me it at 2am or later, I watched it at a decent hour. On a roof no less! The only interruption came in the form of a vomiting man two feet away. Too many White Russians will do that to a guy, I guess.

Yay!
Sarah ♦DiggIt!Add to del.icio.usAdd to Technorati Faves

Thursday, June 11, 2009

A Public Service Announcement

Have you ever seen that series of numbers clicking away above Union Square? People always seem so confused by it. Is it the national debt? A doomsday countdown? A secret??

It's not any of those things.

People? It's an effing clock.

From left to right it gives the time: 17:13 and 35 seconds. AKA 35 seconds past 5:13pm.

"But what about the rest of the numbers??" You ask.

From right to left it is counting down the rest of the day. At 5:13 and 35 seconds there are 6 hours, 46 minutes, and 24 seconds left until midnight.

Are we clear?

Good. ♦DiggIt!Add to del.icio.usAdd to Technorati Faves

Monday, June 01, 2009

I Have....NO PANTS!

Seth and I were talking yesterday (Today? Last week? Some damn day) about how I don't spend money on clothing. And it's true. On a good day my entire outfit (including shoes, purse and underpants) will have cost me exactly $0.00. On an average day maybe $20. My roommate works at a clothing company, my friends love to clean out their closets, and I go to my fair share of clothing swaps. (Also, my everyday purse, a Strand Bag, was found in the garbage. PURE CLASS!) I think the most expensive piece of clothing I own is a hoodie I bought in Spain four years ago for the equivalent of $100.00. And I don't even wear the damn thing anymore!

The last time I bought jeans was years ago, and while for a long time that was okay (because I rarely wore the things) I've found myself drawn to them more and more recently for lack of anything else to wear. And this weekend my favorite of the two pairs I own ripped at the knee. I am still wearing them, but I'm thinking it might be time to invest in a new pair.

So where to go? I'm not spending $180.00 on a pair of Seven's. I owned a pair once, but they were a gift because, again, I am not the type to spend almost $200.00 on a damn pair of jeans. I am cheap. I can accept this.

On top of everything else I HATE SHOPPING FOR JEANS. A lot of girls hate the thought of bathing suit shopping, but for me? Jeans. Fucking Jeans. They. Never. Fit.

H&M jeans are not built for my body. I have a small waist and a big ass, and H&M jeans fail to fit over my thighs if I grab the size that fits my waist. Old Navy is always an option, but their sizing has gotten so wonky in recent years that I'm not even sure if it's worth the trip. (Though I do love walking into the only store in the world where I'm a size 2.) I have a pair of Gap capri's that fit me as pants. And I LOVE THEM. But they no longer have a crotch. So...yeah. I bought a pair of Levi's a couple of years ago because they were having a sale, but ending up turning them into shorts and then tossing them because they looked truely terrible.

Oh, and did I mention that I ABSOLUTELY FUCKING HATE TRYING ON JEANS?

Where the hell do you buy YOUR jeans? Should I just shell out the extra cash? HALP!

(Yes, I am riding on the coattails of The Tigerlily's hose post. Shut up.) ♦DiggIt!Add to del.icio.usAdd to Technorati Faves